 From the folks who brought you Circus Circus comes another family joint with arcades, shows and restaurants designed to keep the kiddies busy while the parents blow a wad in the casino.
Coupons Available for Excalibur Vegas: Free mozzarella sticks at Dick's Last Stand. (Click Here For More Info.)
   
Room Quality: They are clean, on the small side, furnished and have showers, but no tubs. Ask for one of the "widescreen" rooms and get newer furnishings, granite counter tops, better beds and a flat-screen TV.
Service Quality: If you're traveling with kids, this place has tons of stuff for them to eat and do (at extra cost). Check-in can be a time-consuming at just about any hour but especially Thursday and Friday afternoons.
What You Get Bottles of in the Bathroom: Lotion, shampoo and conditioner.
Clientele: If you have a family, you'll fit in.
How's the Pool? The landscaped pool area has a few small pools so they can separate the kids from the adults more easily. There are also cabanas, if you feel inclined to splurge.
Resort Fee: (What is this?) $12.50 per night. You get wired internet, fitness center access, incoming faxes, daily newspaper and local and domestic long-distance calls.
Table Games: All of the usuals, and loads of tables crammed in. They even have the oddballs like Caribbean Stud, Let it Ride and 3-card poker. Craps are in line with the competition, but some blackjack only pays a 6:5 on blackjacks.
Bet Minimums: $5 at some tables in the joint. For craps, you will usually find the minimum to be $5 with 3-4-5x odds. Roulette is $1 chips with a $5 minimum.
Machines: Pennies on up. There are many video-poker machines and none of them are full-pay. There are thousands of slots to choose from, so you will easily find your game of choice in a denomination you want.
Cocktails? Sometimes the cocktails tend to not come as frequent as we may like.
Who Gets Comps? The M Life slot club serves several properties and pays a fair cash rebate on slots, and a half that on video poker. They also occasionally mail out free and discounted room offers.
Dick's Last Resort: Dick's is a chain whose claim to fame is ample portions of standard sports pub fare like crab legs, nachos, steaks, burgers and loads of greasy finger foods. The gimmick is the waiters are rude on purpose (the hostess will flip you off), hand out paper hats and silly bibs, and make an awful racket in general. This place offers live cover bands, and it's also freakin' enormous.
The Steakhouse at Camelot: This is the Excalibur's fine dining restaurant, including a pianist tinkling away on the keys as you eat.
There is a Baja Fresh serving fast Mexican in the hotel. The Village Food Court offers a smattering of fast food choices for those in a hurry to get married or back to ye olde craps game, including an Dairy Queen/Orange Julius, Auntie Annie's Pretzels, Krispy Kreme, McDonalds, Manchu Wok, Pizza Hut Express, Quiznos, Starbucks and, yummm, Cold Stone Creamery. Out by the pool is a little snackery called Drenched.
Australian Bee Gees Show: This tribute to the Bee Gees does not star the Bee Gees. However, it comes from the same continent, so they have that going for them. For an hour and fifteen minutes, you will be regaled by soundalikes performing the music of a band who had its moment in the sun some 30 years ago.
Fun Dungeon: Fun for the kids. The Midway also has motion simulator rides, which are now called 4-D rides.
Thunder from Down Under: This one is for the ladies. Hunky men in hardly anything at all stomp around and glisten as they show off their hard bodies. Do we sound jealous? Heck no. You have no idea how many hotels have been begging us to roll our jelly bellies on their stages.
Tournament of Kings: A jousting show featuring actors in real armor on real horses really bashing each other with sticks. They also serve you a chicken dinner, which you eat with your fingers while you watch. This is ideal for families or fans of Renaissance Faires.
Number of TVs: About 36, all flat and one of them is a giant screen for big events.
Number of Seats: About 130 seats all told. None of them are reserved. Race are unfomfortable and sports are better. Twenty-six seats in racing have individual flat screens.
How Many Betting Windows? At any given time about eight windows for taking race and sports bets.
Free Drinks? Very rarely, if at all. Boo.
Snack Bar? No snack bar, but a Starbuck's is there to make you feel invincible.
Minimum Wager: $5 sports, $2 for racing
Other Notes: They have race and sports facing different directions. The room also serves as the keno lounge, which is becoming pretty common in the casinos.
Number of Tables: There are twelve tables in the Excalibur, which has done away with its experiment with electronic tables. It is now once again regular old poker dealt by real live human beings. About four to six tables go most of the time.
Comfort of Chairs: Decent chairs at average tables. The chairs are slightly above average in comfort.
Closed Room or Open to Casino? Open and right on the casino floor.
Game Spreads and Limits: Hold-em, and hold'em only. They have $1-$2 no-limit and $2-$4 limit, both of which are pretty low-limit games.
Beginner Games or Classes? They will teach you how to play each day at 11 am. This is a good thing to do if you've never played in a casino before, if only so you know the etiquette of when it's appropriate to jump to your feet, shout an expletive and overturn the table.
How Crowded is the Room? Not busy. On a busy weekend you may have to wait up to a half hour, but usually there are enough dealers and tables to get you in right away if you don't care which table you play at.
Comps? One buck an hour plus other promos for players.
How Good Are the Players? Not very good.
What Else Do I Need to Know? Saturday night they have a "Strip" poker tournament where you don't take any clothes off, but a woman does in increments, ending with her wearing underwear.
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